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Thread: Trying to start smoking - need help

  1. #21
    FK Board Loser
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    wow, you must be really desparate for some attention?

  2. #22
    Señor member
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    Re: Yeah, Right Let's kill all smokers

    Originally posted by therion
    Yeah, Right Let's kill all smokers!
    Yeah, right. In the meantime, maybe we could kill off everyone who enjoys a drink! Drink drivers certainly kill more people than smokers.

  3. #23
    dIgital pHoto dude! TheEnigma's Avatar
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    OK - enough of the smoking stuff already - or I am gonna hunt for all the smoking threads and delete them!
    I have gone 2 days now and I am really climbing up walls!

    SO STOP IT ALREADY!

  4. #24
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    Originally posted by TheEnigma
    OK - enough of the smoking stuff already - or I am gonna hunt for all the smoking threads and delete them!
    I have gone 2 days now and I am really climbing up walls!

    SO STOP IT ALREADY!
    Some people take everything too seriously. I thought this thread would be fairly harmless as people are entitled to their opinions - whatever they may be. This one was a daft post but is rapidly getting out of hand because some people are taking it all a bit too personally..... There, I've had my tuppence worth with this one.

  5. #25
    Bamboozled snoop_doug's Avatar
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    - my theory is that finnegan is trying to pick up this "cool" past time to impress someone, maybe of the opposite gender ?

  6. #26
    dIgital pHoto dude! TheEnigma's Avatar
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    Originally posted by snoop_doug
    - my theory is that finnegan is trying to pick up this "cool" past time to impress someone, maybe of the opposite gender ?
    Hmm - sad case!

  7. #27
    Sauguät

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    i really like the cough that comes with smoking. one feels so alive.
    at least for the time being

  8. #28
    Bamboozled snoop_doug's Avatar
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    Originally posted by eulci
    i really like the cough that comes with smoking. one feels so alive.
    at least for the time being
    an unrivalled note of croakiness (unsure of spelling)

  9. #29
    Bamboozled snoop_doug's Avatar
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    Originally posted by finnegan
    Hi

    I am trying to start smoking but I just can't. I hack and cough and wheeze. This doesn't seem to happen to other smokers as intensely as it does to me.

    Smoking is sooooooo cool. I desperately want to look cool, just like the shiny, happy people in the magazine ads, but it's just not happening for me. I tried applying nicotine patches all over my body, but they lack the necessary cool factor (pretty good nic buzz though).

    I also have a desire to litter. I don't of course, but I noticed that smokers (actually most people) don't consider cigarette butts to be litter. Smoking would also satisfy this urge.

    Does anybody have any suggestions?

    when you say you want to pick up smoking, you do mean tobacco ?

  10. #30
    Old Member gecko2's Avatar
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    To really start smoking simply whip down to your local tobacconist are buy 10 King Edward cigars, price vary on location, and chain smoke them all until all are gone. When smoking these cigars make sure you take deep breaths of the smoke for effect. Why not try eating cream crackers at the same time? But do NOT drink anything at all inbetween smoking the cigars and eating the crackers because it will turn your hair blue instantly. Another favourite of mine is sticking my head in a deep fat fryer, make sure the power is turned to full, not forgetting to remove your close relatives dead pet. But always remember, have fun!!!!!

  11. #31
    not your average sock puppet finnegan's Avatar
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    Originally posted by snoop_doug
    - my theory is that finnegan is trying to pick up this "cool" past time to impress someone, maybe of the opposite gender ?
    Nope.

    It was just intended as a bit of harmless fun. OK, I knew it would be flame-bait for some, but I underestimated the response. I promise to never, ever bring up smoking in here again.

    You made an assumption about my sexual orientation - I am straight - is it obvious?

    Cheers

  12. #32
    Bamboozled snoop_doug's Avatar
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    Originally posted by finnegan
    Originally posted by snoop_doug
    - my theory is that finnegan is trying to pick up this "cool" past time to impress someone, maybe of the opposite gender ?
    Nope.

    It was just intended as a bit of harmless fun. OK, I knew it would be flame-bait for some, but I underestimated the response. I promise to never, ever bring up smoking in here again.

    You made an assumption about my sexual orientation - I am straight - is it obvious?

    Cheers
    i never thought smoking would impress a fellow bloke, because us men all can do it anyway

  13. #33
    not your average sock puppet finnegan's Avatar
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    Originally posted by snoop_doug
    i never thought smoking would impress a fellow bloke, because us men all can do it anyway
    Correct. To impress other guys, we usually have to rely on alcohol consumption or extreme sports.

  14. #34
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    smoking rules, 3 years now and going strong! menthols, baby!

  15. #35
    Bamboozled snoop_doug's Avatar
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    BENSON & HEDGES :d

  16. #36
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    Ex Menthol Smoker here - (we're the worst ya know!) My .02 to this thread which I personally found to be very funny in it's lighthearted way, but I just gotta tell ya that from my experience, from what I have seen, smokers look the absolute coolest when they are sitting upright in order to sleep because to lie down would literally killem dead; and, it is way cool when you can hear them wheeze across the room - so the wife will know when the old man kicks the bucket because it will really be quiet for once.

    The smokers' chest kicks everything even tatoos cuz the coolest ever is when your chest is so round you look like a wine barrel sitting in bed and you can see a valley in between each rib when they are trying to suck in the air.

    Nothing ever though is as cool as when the smoker is putting the cigarette in the little hole in the adam's apple area for breathing since his throat was destroyed from the cancer, or when the cigar smokers get big chunks of their lips removed or when they smoke their cigarettes in public while wearing their O's (code for oxygen)...

    Think about all the cool accessories (not a 6CD changer)you know - those fancy face masks, and the extra long cord for when you get to go to the mall and drag that portable compressor (not the kind they sell in the auto parts stores!) with you everywhere.

    Breath deep the gathering gloom....

    Oh well - I couldn't help to think some of us are actually young enough to be impressionable and maybe this will stop one more person from the misconception of what really is cool.

    "I am not young enough to know everything."

  17. #37
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    Thumbs up Move to Canada

    Hey Finn, try moving to Canada. I too had trouble picking up smoking when I lived in Boise, but since I crossed the 49th into 'god's country' (can I say god here?) it's like 'light em up baby!'.

    Seriously, the cigarettes they make up here are light enough not to make you cough too much, yet they'll still stink, cause cancer, and piss people off so you'll be able to feel really cool.

    I don't know if you're willing to relocate (assuming you're not Canadian) to get into this new hobby, but that's my $.02

    Benson and Hedges indeed!

  18. #38
    dIgital pHoto dude! TheEnigma's Avatar
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    Pattik - you have a really pesimistic outlook on the whole affair - and thatnks for that - just what I needed!

  19. #39
    Undercover Puppy
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    As long as I don't inhale too much second hand smoke I'll be just dandy

    But my opinon : It stinks, it really does. Not to mention the bad breath that comes with this addiction. Geez, once met a gorgeous girl, nice to talk with, but her breath, OH MY GOD !!! She could kill insects with it, for real ...
    The biggest turn off ever.

    Ro

  20. #40
    Sauguät

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    Re: Move to Canada

    Originally posted by skookumblue
    Hey Finn, try moving to Canada. I too had trouble picking up smoking when I lived in Boise, but since I crossed the 49th into 'god's country' (can I say god here?) it's like 'light em up baby!'.

    Seriously, the cigarettes they make up here are light enough not to make you cough too much, yet they'll still stink, cause cancer, and piss people off so you'll be able to feel really cool.

    I don't know if you're willing to relocate (assuming you're not Canadian) to get into this new hobby, but that's my $.02

    Benson and Hedges indeed!
    hey skookums, ain't the pictures on the packs here so cool?

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