Customers say:
"We've already registered the domain name(s) for our site!"

What you want to say:
"Oh great, now we have to piss about changing nameservers and paying ransom demands to some ****ty ISP"

What you have to say:
"Well done, you know just as much about the Net as we do, if not more!"


Customers say:
"I don't know anything about this Net business, I'm afraid."

What you want to say:
"Then shut up and let us do your site the way we want."

What you have to say:
"Don't apologise, why would you know about this geeky stuff? You're a reputable firm of widget manufacturers. We envy you, because what you make is REAL (etc etc)"


Customers say:
"I hear these computer viruses are very dangerous. What chance is there of me catching one from this Website you're making? I'm a diabetic you know."

What you want to say:
"Ha ha ha."

What you have to say:
"You need Norton Antivirus 2003, go to norton.com.. etc."


Customers say:
"I went to the Website you made for me and now I can't make Winamp work. What's wrong with the Website and why have you made such a terrible mistake?"

What you want to say:
"Piss off."

What you have to say:
"Piss off." (Well, there's only so much you can take.)


Anyone else want to post one?