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Thread: same sex marriage - what's the big deal???

  1. #1
    ¤ ¤ ¤ PAZ ¤ ¤ ¤ nordberg's Avatar
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    same sex marriage - what's the big deal???

    *** this is a sensitive subject - please keep the discussion clean ***

    there's been such a big brewhaha about this lately, and it's really driving me crazy. why would anyone care if someone else gets married or not? it baffles me that others care so deeply about what's going on with 2 people they have never met! what are the arguements AGAINST same sex marriages? they only thing i can see is that the conservatives are saying it's 'immoral', but isn't divorce immoral too? <--- which is waaaaay more common. should we outlaw divorce as well? again, what's the big freakin' deal????

    what do you think?

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    a note from the editor: please keep in mind that while same sex marriages are ILLEGAL, drive thru liquor stores are LEGAL.

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  2. #2
    Senior Member webcorps's Avatar
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    I think they should have at it, its enough of this carefree life for them, if we have to be subjugated to ole ball and chain, then they should too. Im sure they couldnt do any worse than we have with this so-called "sanctified" institution.

  3. #3
    Karma police phreakdevil's Avatar
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    Well i think that ppl that are aginst it are either because they hate homosexuals or because of their religion.
    Personally i think is stupid that still at this date same sex marriages arnt legal.
    I feel that the ppl against it cant understand that there might be a different reality for others.

    this has been discussed to death tho

  4. #4
    Running Plodding & Limping SpockBert's Avatar
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    I got no problem with it, if two adults wanna marry then fine.

    my only concern is if they adopt a kid, and it has to grow up with 2 dads, not really a normal environment for a child.

    its a tricky one

  5. #5
    poet and narcisist argonauta's Avatar
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    Originally posted by SpockBert
    I got no problem with it, if two adults wanna marry then fine.

    my only concern is if they adopt a kid, and it has to grow up with 2 dads, not really a normal environment for a child.

    its a tricky one
    it could even be more normal than be raised by divorced mother and father. Or by a single mother.
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  6. #6
    Superman Daniellawson's Avatar
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    Originally posted by SpockBert
    my only concern is if they adopt a kid, and it has to grow up with 2 dads, not really a normal environment for a child.
    I agree 100%.

  7. #7
    An Inconvenient Serving Size hurricaneone's Avatar
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    I couldn't give a hairy rat's ass if two men or two women want to tie the knot, but the catch 22 of modern life is that the person in Austin (or Auxerre or Antwerp or Anglesea) who is dead against it can get their opposing opinion heard quicker than the happy couple can say 'I do', which then invloves 'a voter', which then involves legislation to outlaw the offending practice. You mix in the immoral nature of the union, as put forward by the Church and you've got yourself a pretty firm stand against the practice.

    In my mind though, both the State and the Church have waived the right to define what is moral and what is not, finding their own puritanical guidelines as difficult to follow as the rest of the sinners, making their claim to hold the final decision over the legality of same-sex union questionable at best.

    As for the children issue, that is a difficult one. Where as you don't want to deny the right to raise a child to a male or female relationship, kids can be cruel and schooling the adopted child could be very difficult.

    (I think that I said something like that in another thread)
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    ¤ ¤ ¤ PAZ ¤ ¤ ¤ nordberg's Avatar
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    Originally posted by SpockBert
    my only concern is if they adopt a kid, and it has to grow up with 2 dads, not really a normal environment for a child.
    really?....i mean....really?

    what's normal? being raised by 2 men/women who are madly in love, hard-working, tax-paying citizens is somehow worse than a single mom who lets her drug-using parolled boyfriend spend the night all the time? how about the dad who comes home and slaps the mom around; is that better than two parents of the same gender? i would wager that if a same-sex couple gets to the point where they are adopting a child, that their home life is much more normal than most of ours. i just don't buy that argument - it implies that because of someones sexuality, that they are less capable of loving a child. beleive me, it's near impossible not to love your child....

    H1 - you are right about the teasing at school, but come on...if it's not the gay parents, it would just be something else. kids are equal opportunity bullies....

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  9. #9
    I've been thinking the same things lately, nordberg. The only opposition that I have heard against it is based on religion or something like morals which can not be defined (see 'normal' reference above. normal can not be defined and there are always exceptions to the rule). I thought that this argument is for same sex marriages being recognized by the government, not the religious institutions. If religions don't want want it, then they don't need to accept it, but I don't see any reason why they can not be married in the eyes of the government.

    I see this issue as a group trying to stop two people that love each other from having the same rights as another two people who love each other.

    I like this: "kids are equal opportunity bullies..."

  10. #10
    Retired SCORM Guru PAlexC's Avatar
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    Gay people can't mess up marriage more than straight people already have.

    The government isn't legislating that churches have to recognize it, the debate is over marriage as a legal instituion, so there's no issue there regarding freedom of religion.

    I find it ironic that a lot of congressmen voting on this are twice and thrice divorced. They're in no position to talk about the sanctity of marriage. Especially when networks are making game shows out of it.

    However, if any gay friends of mine ever get married, I'm disassociating myself from them until the planning is over. 1 bride planning a wedding is *****y enough. 2 gay men can't be better.

    I don't know if it's just getting more media attention, or if conservative Christianity is gaining more ground in this country. You've got more debates over evolution vs. creationism lately, books saying the Grand Canyon was formed during Noah's flood, arguments over holiday religious symbols, and airline pilots and pharmacists who don't understand the difference between job requirements and personal beliefs.

    We seem to be torn by extremes on both sides of civil liberties and religion. People need to chill.
    Last edited by PAlexC; 02-13-2004 at 11:32 AM.

  11. #11
    Retired Mod aversion's Avatar
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    I see no reason against it. The only people that object are those who are too narrow minded or homophobic to stop and think, I don't care if they don't like it, I just wish they would stop trying to force their views on to other people's lives. If the church is that against it fine, but marriage is a legal institution not a religious one, and there are plenty of other places gay couples can get married.

    though a history professor told me that it's a little known fact that there was a period in the middle ages in europe where only same sex couples would get married in churches because it was a union of real love, most marriages then were similar to business arrangements.

    Kids in same sex marriages could be teased etc as said but things like this pass, after a few generations it won't be such a big deal. Some more enlightened countries are already reaching this point, I saw a doco on same sex couples with kids in europe and the kids were bullied no more or less than anyone else at school. The more bigotted people stick their noses into other people's business the worse it is for the kids, afterall I think all western countries allow same sex couples to adopt don't they? That's been going on for years.

  12. #12
    Retired Mod aversion's Avatar
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    Originally posted by PAlexC
    We seem to be torn by extremes on both sides of civil liberties and religion. People need to chill.
    hundreds of people recently filed a lawsuit for millions of dollars against janet jackson because her superbowl stunt caused them "serious injury"... we have a long way to go before soceity chills unfortunately.

  13. #13
    Retired SCORM Guru PAlexC's Avatar
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    Originally posted by SpockBert
    I got no problem with it, if two adults wanna marry then fine.

    my only concern is if they adopt a kid, and it has to grow up with 2 dads, not really a normal environment for a child.

    its a tricky one
    I think that depends more on the quality of the parent than their orientation, you can get dud parents on both sides.

    But I agree to an extent. No reason to deny a kid a mother and a father if you don't have to.

    This is also why I don't get 'feminists' who don't believe in marriage but want a kid. Why on earth would you raise a child on your own if you don't have to? Why do it to the kid? Why do it to yourself, you know how hard that is?

    If you get divorced, separated, a parent dies, or one parent is abusive and needs to be taken out of the picture, well, you've really got no option, fine, understandable.

    But when you say 'I want a child and I want to raise it myself', it's not about the kid, it's selfish. THAT is a recipie for a messed-up kid.

  14. #14
    Retired SCORM Guru PAlexC's Avatar
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    Originally posted by aversion
    hundreds of people recently filed a lawsuit for millions of dollars against janet jackson because her superbowl stunt caused them "serious injury"... we have a long way to go before soceity chills unfortunately.
    Maybe society needs a cooler. Patrick Swayze?

  15. #15
    Retired Mod aversion's Avatar
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    Originally posted by PAlexC
    But when you say 'I want a child and I want to raise it myself', it's not about the kid, it's selfish. THAT is a recipie for a messed-up kid.
    I disagree completely.

  16. #16
    FK's Giant Steve_w_V's Avatar
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    Why? It's just not right. No matter what side you come from, secular or religious, there is no way you can say it is a "natural" thing. It's gross. How would you feel if you had 2 moms or 2 dads? No freakin way. The chances in being gay yourself is way higher if you are brought up around it. Heck, if you have a lot of older brothers it's been shown to have a greater chance that you will be gay...sorry... homosexual.

    It's just wrong.

    *shudder*
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  17. #17
    Retired Mod aversion's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Steve_w_V
    Why? It's just not right. No matter what side you come from, secular or religious, there is no way you can say it is a "natural" thing. It's gross. How would you feel if you had 2 moms or 2 dads? No freakin way. The chances in being gay yourself is way higher if you are brought up around it. Heck, if you have a lot of older brothers it's been shown to have a greater chance that you will be gay...sorry... homosexual.

    It's just wrong.

    *shudder*
    that's your opinion, just an opinion like anyone else's, and that's fine, but why should your opinion be forced on people who disagree with you?

    and I would say it's a very natural thing.
    Last edited by aversion; 02-13-2004 at 12:05 PM.

  18. #18
    I Mastered Dead Technology TallGuyLittleCar's Avatar
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    Isn't marriage a religious concept? Going by that i don't see what right the federal government has in it at all, weather it between a man and a woman, a man and a man, a women and a women, or a man and a 2004 ford gt.

    What changes by having that little certificate from the government?
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  19. #19
    I Mastered Dead Technology TallGuyLittleCar's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Steve_w_V
    [B]Why? It's just not right. No matter what side you come from, secular or religious, there is no way you can say it is a "natural" thing. It's gross.
    than don't married to a guy. Heck I think alot of things are gross, doesn't mean i'm entilted to do anything about it.

    The chances in being gay yourself is way higher if you are brought up around it.
    You got a link to back that up. from What i read the chances of being homosexual are much much lower if raised by a homosexual couple.
    ONLY RON PAUL AND ALUMINUM FOIL CAN SAVE YOU NOW!
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  20. #20
    Retired SCORM Guru PAlexC's Avatar
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    Marriage can be simply a political institution as well.

    That's why you can get married by a justice of the peace or Elvis and enjoy the tax and car insurance benefits. That's what we're talking about here, not forcing churches to change their stance.

    Ever known 2 married atheiests? I have.

    aversion: I respect your disagreeing with me, but you gotta back it up, you can't just say 'I disagree', that ain't fair.

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