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Thread: Have you ever gotten caught spanking the bacon?

  1. #1
    Likes Pankakes
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    Have you ever gotten caught spanking the bacon?

    or strokin' the pastrami, cleaning the pipes etc...you know what I mean...

    as for me, I haven't been caught but it's been close.

  2. #2
    ....he's amazing!!! lesli_felix's Avatar
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    You mean cracking one off? rubbing one out etc?

    I never get caught. I wear a long jacket and pretend I'm reading the metro.

    Nobody suspects a thing.

  3. #3
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    haha thats hilarious...all the different terms for it sound funny, for example: Giving the 'Private' a dishonorable discharge.

  4. #4
    AKA [ Paul Bainbridge] webdreamer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lesli_felix
    You mean cracking one off? rubbing one out etc?

    I never get caught. I wear a long jacket and pretend I'm reading the metro.

    Nobody suspects a thing.
    Love it!
    Caught once when i was 13.
    Also known as the "ham shank", "spanking the monkey" and me favorite. Jenny and her four friends :>
    .: To me AS is like LEGO, Only for the big Kids :.
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  5. #5
    supervillain gerbick's Avatar
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    Get a room!

    [ Hello ] | [ gerbick ] | [ Ω ]

  6. #6
    ....he's amazing!!! lesli_felix's Avatar
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    Gerbs, we're talking about the "single player mode".

  7. #7
    AKA [ Paul Bainbridge] webdreamer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lesli_felix
    Gerbs, we're talking about the "single player mode".
    Haha Great cum back
    .: To me AS is like LEGO, Only for the big Kids :.
    - Site - Blog - Twitter - Linkedin
    bringmadeleinehome.com

  8. #8
    supervillain gerbick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lesli_felix
    Gerbs, we're talking about the "single player mode".
    trust. I couldn't find a G-rated single's only image. You lucked out and got the benefit of a doubt that a woman might be involved.

    Real or imaginary.

    [ Hello ] | [ gerbick ] | [ Ω ]

  9. #9
    Official Vermont Photo Mod WannaBe_80z's Avatar
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    Wow.
    "Let us declare nature to be legitimate. All plants should be declared legal, and all animals for that matter. The notion of illegal plants and animals is obnoxious and ridiculous."- T. McKenna

  10. #10
    supervillain gerbick's Avatar
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    Yeah. I have a feeling today is going to be one of those days...

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  11. #11
    Official Vermont Photo Mod WannaBe_80z's Avatar
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    It has already begun.
    "Let us declare nature to be legitimate. All plants should be declared legal, and all animals for that matter. The notion of illegal plants and animals is obnoxious and ridiculous."- T. McKenna

  12. #12
    supervillain gerbick's Avatar
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    No ****.

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  13. #13
    say no more loydall's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by webdreamer
    Jenny and her four friends :>
    Or:

    Madame palm and her five lovely daughters

  14. #14
    ....he's amazing!!! lesli_felix's Avatar
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    "Squeezing the lizard" is perhaps my favourite - I believe there's a motorhead lyric in honor of this analogy.

    "five knuckle shuffle" is another favourite.

    perhaps the most literary reference is "onanism"

    I can't believe I know so much about this subject, perhaps now would be the time to shut up.....

  15. #15
    Official Vermont Photo Mod WannaBe_80z's Avatar
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    Masturbating
    "Let us declare nature to be legitimate. All plants should be declared legal, and all animals for that matter. The notion of illegal plants and animals is obnoxious and ridiculous."- T. McKenna

  16. #16
    He has risen! lefteyewilly's Avatar
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    flogging the dolphin

  17. #17
    Spartan Mop Warrior Loyal Rogue's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by webdreamer
    Jenny and her four friends
    ::
    "Just go make web and stfu already." - jAQUAN

    "Twitter is a public display of verbal diarrhea that comes out in small squirts." - Gerbick

  18. #18
    Juvenile Delinquent CVO Chris's Avatar
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    You can also call it:

    Choke the chicken.
    Bash the bishop.

    The fear of getting caught is the exciting part!

  19. #19

  20. #20
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    FK continues to deliver education.

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