"Let us declare nature to be legitimate. All plants should be declared legal, and all animals for that matter. The notion of illegal plants and animals is obnoxious and ridiculous."- T. McKenna
Owner: Why isn't the tree you're in charge of growing faster?
Vendor: Some dog has been peeing on it.
Owner:Oh yah, someone at a party said dog piss works so I've been paying another guy to bring his dogs by to piss on your tree one a week.