Sorry guys, I just have no where else to post this. Kinda have to play nice now that I represent my employers.
The transition over here has been nothing short of brutal but until recently is was only brutal in the host of inconveniences sort. With the amount of effort I've put in to getting a high-speed connection its broken through to total insanity.
There's this added depression in knowing you've failed to communicate your intent due to the language barrier. I don't hate them for that, I'm the foreigner. Its admirable that so many Germans speak english as well as they do. But it doesn't make me feel any less defeated.
So there's like two parent companies in Germany, Kabel Deutschland which is their cox/comcast and Deutsch Telekom which is like AT&T + Sprint without the monopoly penalties. I really wouldn't be surprised to find out Kabel Deutschland is owned by Telekom too, everyone else is. See, there's T-Mobile, O2, 1&1 and TKS. Doesn't matter which one you choose to do business with, they all resell Telekom's DSL service.
We had set up our cell phone service through T-mobile simply because they have a shop near by with nice english speaking employees. We returned to the store the day after we got the keys to our house to order internet service. We were shown their plans and the best option was a land-line/DSL combo called Talk&Surf. The way we understood upon leaving with a new contract was that a tech would have to come out and connect our phone line to the PBX first so that they could verify the line quality before connecting the DSL. When you first get here, the army puts you up in a hotel for 30 days in which time you must find a place to live. In a rush, we took the first place that would work. Luckily we found an amazing house that was brand spanking new. We had no idea a new house means zero ability to determine our line quality. Two weeks later a tech finally connects our phone and shortly after we find out not only did our contract involve only a land-line, but we could not get DSL at our address.
I assumed it was because the phone line was still spool of wire in the garage and simply needed a tech to come out and connect it too. No amount of calls to Telekom got them to explain why. You have to call, wait for automated system (in german) to realize you haven't pressed any buttons and connect you to a csr repeatedly until you get a hold of someone who speaks some english. I can't manage to explain why my address won't come up on their computer and finally get my landlord to call. She got them to schedule an appointment at the end of the month. So it would be six weeks from the time I moved in but at least I knew it was happening. Curiosity to know exactly which day there were coming got the better of me and I called again to find out. I was delighted to find out that I was scheduled for the coming wednesday, almost two weeks sooner. On that wednesday I refuse to leave the house and by 2 oclock couldn't take it anymore and called to get an ETA on my tech. They told me my appointment had been canceled three days prior. Again I couldn't understand their explanation. In a panic I start calling the other companies.
1&1 was able to recognize I don't speak german immediately and politely took down my info. A tech called me back less than 10 minutes later speaking very good english. He was able to tell me right away that my neighborhood switch box was full. WTF couldn't Telekom just fk'ing say that instead of dragging me through the mud and waisting all of my time. I still work for an american company and the limited data on my "unlimited" cell phone plan was fading fast.
I call T-mobile to see if they have any kind of wireless internet service no matter how slow. A very nice lady said she's have to do some research and call me back. She did, and said I could get a wireless DSL plan with unlimited data for a decent rate. Sold! Send it! Now, in the mean time I've been calling T-mobile pleading with them to sell me more data on my "unlimited" data plan to tide me over until I get a connection. Each time I was sold some temporary, limited and costly solution. None of those times did they actually add it to my account and send me the hardware (USB sticks, secondary SIM cards). So naturally I was doubtful about my new wireless dsl. Called back the next, big shock, no record of it. RE-ordered it. Called back today where there was a record... FOR REGULAR DSL. "Yes sir, you are all set for.. oh wait... we have a problem. You can't get DSL in your area."
There's more to the story but it all leads to the same "I have no fk'ing clue when, if ever I can get a goddamn internet connection" hell. My patience is pretty much gone, my nerves are pretty much shot and despite some forward thinking in other places, Germany pretty much sucks.
<sorry, had to get that out>
