Something is wrong with me!. I think

**kjamx** · 09-08-2005, 01:21 AM

Ok so I am finally ready to talk about it. About 10 weeks ago my girlfriend broke up with me after almost 4 years of an amazing relationship. She told me that she was just not feeling it and that she does love me but she just wanted other things because I was reading myself to settle down and stuff like that and she was just not ready for that and ultimately broke up with me and started going out with some one else from her job. Of course I felt devastated because of it and honestly felt lost because I do love her and all. But seriously it has been almost three months and i just seem to be getting worse I mean I want to get better and move on but just the thought of her with someone else sickens me. We spoke again a few days ago after like 2 months of not even seeing each other and I was fine but then suddenly I started asking her to reconsider and that she should be with me and all this and that and all she said that I shouldn't ask those questions because makes her feel uncomfortable and that I know that she is with someone else and that I should just move on. I asked her to tell me in my face whether she loves me or not and she said that she can't because she was someone else now and that it wouldn't be fair for him.

Now am I wrong to hope for us to come back together or to even hope that she still has feelings for me or whatever because honestly I am crazy about her and I am honestly feeling like I can't go on. What’s wrong with me?

**luvenny** · 09-08-2005, 01:24 AM

none. nothing is wrong with you. it's just the normal cycle...

how about waiting for someone for over 4+ years, and not even in a relationship or whatsoever before with the person? now that's sick. no? i know someone.

**PAlexC** · 09-08-2005, 01:25 AM

Question 1: How old are you?
Question 2: *BACKHAND-SLAP*

**kjamx** · 09-08-2005, 01:27 AM

Originally Posted by PAlexC

Question 1: How old are you?
Question 2: *BACKHAND-SLAP*

I'm 26!

and why the slap

**PAlexC** · 09-08-2005, 01:34 AM

To snap you out of it.

**kjamx** · 09-08-2005, 01:36 AM

Originally Posted by PAlexC

To snap you out of it.

thank you you are very suportive but maybe u right! sorry

**argonauta** · 09-08-2005, 01:44 AM

Originally Posted by luvenny

how about waiting for someone for over 4+ years, and not even in a relationship or whatsoever before with the person? now that's sick. no? i know someone.

sounds like Clark Kent and Lana Lang (sorry, i've been watching smallville).

Hello, I'm 25
almost 2 years ago i broke up with my gfriend. I was devastated, but you know, I learned a couple of things: begging and crying and requesting to go back together is bad, doesn't work. It's not like asking for your job position to be restored. Love comes, love goes. What you had is gone.

Now, you can stay around, learn to be without her, learn that your life is complete with or without her, learn to live without needing anybody. Learn to see her in the eye without wanting her back.

The thing is, the things that she liked about you aren't there anymore, or maybe the things she wants now are not to be found in you. You need to move on and see that all that is gone. Maybe, if you're willing, you can get her back, not by reminding her how good it was when you were together, because that was destroyed already, but by starting all over, as if you didn't know who she is, what she likes. You'd need to start all over again, maybe first as friends, maybe seeing if you can enjoy being together again.

One thing though, and it worked really well for me. Analize what went wrong, what you can improve in yourself, in your life, in everything. Just learn from your mistakes, and if you learn well, the most probable thing is that you'll get someone better.

**justice strike** · 09-08-2005, 01:59 AM

breakups suck, it always takes the best of you, if you let it. Even after half a year or a year you still think about it with the dreaded "could it been different if i had..." thought. And though you might not want to hear it, there is no quick garantued way to stop feeling the way you do.

**Napalm** · 09-08-2005, 02:15 AM

You can't make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them until they give in

**zakp0** · 09-08-2005, 02:36 AM

I say follow in that guy's footsteps...from 40 Days and 40 Nights...soon you'll be over her and you wont even know it

Public Service Announcement: This method has NOT been tested my moi. Resistance from sex might prove futile.

**nizamm** · 09-08-2005, 03:56 AM

Do it the hindi movie style.

Send few thugs after the new guy your chick is after and knock him down.
Send the same thugs after your chick, and save her from them.
Tip them later....

And, you're done!
Voila!

**argonauta** · 09-08-2005, 04:38 AM

You know, i'm watching smallville (i'm in season 3 right now, still haven't seen the rest). Anyway, Clark loves Lana, but Lana has a bfriend. So Clark becomes her bestfriend, and after a whole year, she starts having feelings for him. It takes another year for them to finally date, and then he realizes he loves her so much, so he can't be with her (you know, clark kent=superman=problems around him all the time).

So, Lana, instead of trying to understand the situation, just gets all mad and crazy, and then, now, she's dating another guy. She's even giving him...an apartment. Eventhough she still loves Clark.

Even so, she can't let Clark alone, and let him go. So he always has his issues with her, and can't move on.

Anyway, you see that Lana seems like the perfect girl for Clark, but she isn't because in the movies he meets Louise Lane (is that her name) and they fall in love...although it took like 10 movies for her to notice that Clark IS SUPERMAN.

Anyway, my point is: girls are blind, they can't see the superman in all of us, and instead of staying by the side of those who want to protect them, they go and hug the simple guys that don't deserve them.

In conclussion, buy a blue suit, a red cape and learn to fly!

**indivision** · 09-08-2005, 04:48 AM

if you want any chance of getting back together with or you want to just move on, the solution is the same: basically avoid her. dont make any plans to be around her in any way (friends or whatever). do not be available to her for a good while (at least 3 months).

if you continue to harrass her (and it may already be too late) you will eliminate any chance at all of getting back together with her. and if it doesn't happen anyway, you will be well on your way to the next thing. dont leave in some dramatic way either. just fall off the map. if she tracks you down, just say you're busy doing this and that. make it short and get out of there. it's tough, but it's the only way, regardless of what you want to happen.

**hanratty21** · 09-08-2005, 09:26 AM

Beer and sluts can be your friends in these trying times.

**silverx2** · 09-08-2005, 09:26 AM

Originally Posted by luvenny

none. nothing is wrong with you. it's just the normal cycle...

how about waiting for someone for over 4+ years, and not even in a relationship or whatsoever before with the person? now that's sick. no? i know someone.

im going to give you the same advice 14 gap girls gave me.

buy me beer and ill sleep with you.

err wait thats not right... i know its in my brain somewhere... oh right, if its meant to be its meant to be, your a great guy, and if she doesnt want you then shes a whore.

i can safely say that iv wanted to be with a bunch of girls over the last three years, but if one specific girl had given me the chance i would have dropped all the other girls i like forever, in a heartbeat, i like this girl that much. all you can really do is make yourself as good as you can and hope then one day she will come back to you and wont have an std or kids.

**silverx2** · 09-08-2005, 09:31 AM

Originally Posted by indivision

if you want any chance of getting back together with or you want to just move on, the solution is the same: basically avoid her. dont make any plans to be around her in any way (friends or whatever). do not be available to her for a good while (at least 3 months).

if you continue to harrass her (and it may already be too late) you will eliminate any chance at all of getting back together with her. and if it doesn't happen anyway, you will be well on your way to the next thing. dont leave in some dramatic way either. just fall off the map. if she tracks you down, just say you're busy doing this and that. make it short and get out of there. it's tough, but it's the only way, regardless of what you want to happen.

id say instead of saying your busy, let you know that it isnt fair to you to be concerned about her while she is with another person, your not her pet and if she wants a shoulder to cry on go find a girl.

maby a little less blunt, but if she is going to pull teh fair card on you, you have every right to counter it.

**kjamx** · 09-08-2005, 11:29 AM

Originally Posted by silverx2

id
maby a little less blunt, but if she is going to pull teh fair card on you, you have every right to counter it.

U see that's what I am sensing that I should fight for her a bit more but at the same time I also think that if we are to be together I should just let the universe unfold and be patient...what am I talking about..good thing love doesn't require intelligence cuz I suck at this...4 years and everything and everyone around me is like WTF happen. In 4 years we never even had a argument..I am telling you guys that it was like a perfect relationship so now I am like how can she just do this...

LOVE SUCKS!

***gerbick*** · 09-08-2005, 11:43 AM

no. being stupid about love sucks.

I'll be more harsh than anybody else in this thread. If you think that you're going to meet only one person in your life that you just "click" with, you're an idiot. Travel abroad, there's women in every single city that'll be better for you than the one that just pulled that **** on you. Want to be an idiot for life? Keep pining away for a woman that didn't want you.

Sureshot way to prove that men are indeed the more stupid of the species on a daily.

Move along. Best revenge in life is living well. There'll be more. If you want to remain a fool, cry yourself to sleep over a woman that doesn't care for you as much as you cared for her.

**silverx2** · 09-08-2005, 11:47 AM

kjam i know exactly what your saying and the best advice i can give you is dont be like me, be like gerbs, sure he has had his fair share of pychos, but at least hes (probably) getting some.

***gerbick*** · 09-08-2005, 11:50 AM

No, don't date psychos. I'm about to publish a 12 step way to find a "not-so-psycho chick" to date here shortly.

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